Last week, we visited Knole Park which is a National Trust managed estate that is home to 350 wild deer and the herd's ancestors date back more than 500 years.
Our visit was during 'The Rut' season which happens during the Autumn. 'The Rut' is when male deer are full of testosterone, their antlers are at their strongest and they fight over females and land. Stags or Bucks lock horns and competitively push against one another.
Whether we refer to a male deer as a Stag or a Buck is dependent on their breed. Male Red Deer and Sika Deer for example are Stags. Male Roe Deer and Fallow Deer are Bucks. Knole Park is home to both Fallow and Sika Deer and whilst we saw many Deer dotted about the estate, we spent about half hour observing a group of between 15 and 20 Fallow Bucks. Some were young, small in stature with dainty, little antlers and some were older, bigger and bolder with mighty antlers.
It was a real treat to be able to witness these boys during The Rut. It was a first for us, something we'd not seen before. Interestingly, during our time here, we barely saw the female deer that belong to the herd. A couple briefly hopped past but otherwise we only saw the Bucks. From a safe distance, we stood watching a group of them and we were delighted to see the performances that took place and the dynamics were fascinating.
There was one big guy, who had claim over a circle of trees. We were informed by one of the groundsmen that he is protecting that territory and the females that he has his stamp on. Whilst occasionally, he made some barking noises and patrolled the parameter and was clearly willing to tackle anyone brave enough to challenge him, he had an air of calm about him. We witnessed one younger Buck have a tussle with him but it was a mild attempt that only lasted a few seconds before he backed off. This Buck gave the impression that he was confident in his stance and willing to protect what he believed to be rightfully his but he didn't feel the need to make a song and dance about it. He didn't need to prove something all day, every day. He was smarter than that. He reserved his energy for the real showdowns that were ahead.
There was another large Buck, by some trees that lay opposite this guy. He was relentless in his marching, his stomping, his yelling and digging at the ground. None of the other deer were approaching him. In fact, they seemed to avoid him entirely. Yet, this noisy and aggravated male spent a lot of time defending territory that no one was trying to steal from him. Naturally, he was expecting a battle. He was on guard for a fight, just in case, making a real song and dance about it. You could feel him shouting, "Come at me bro! Come. At. Me!" No one came.
One huge, older looking Buck was sat on the grass, very chilled out but kept barking. By daughter thought the deer calls sounding like loud burps and it's a fair comparison. This guy was very entertaining to watch. As he yelled, you could see his voice box moving up and down in his throat. You could feel the testosterone pumping in him! However, he didn't stand up once. He felt experienced. I wonder if the young bucks ask him for tales of days gone by... He gave the vibe that he was aware of the tension rising around him, he maybe was getting mildly hyped up by it, he knows what's happening here, but also really didn't feel the need to get up right now. It was as if he was letting the other males know "I've been here and done this before you know and whilst I could smash you if I wanted, I've got some some old war stories to tell, I'm exerting some control right now and I know this isn't my fight."
There were younger Bucks who didn't even bother getting involved. They were positioned slightly further out from the noise and bravado, preferring peace and play. They were eating the grass or laying down or even exploring other places. Some of the small ones gently bumped heads with one another, softly nudging their antlers together, practising for what's to come one day. But generally, they knew this was not their time.
Watching these Bucks, it was clear to me what the spiritual symbolism was: Pick Your Battles.
Stag and Buck remind us to check in with ourselves and ask what am I fighting for?
There are times when it is necessary to protect what is valuable to you. I like the word protect, rather than defend. Protect has a different energetic vibration to it. Can you feel it? You might need to protect your time, your space, your wellbeing, your relationships and that which you worked hard to create in life. When people challenge you on this - and sometimes they will - these things are worthy of your protection. Butt heads if you have to and stand up for what is rightfully yours. But in order to do it effectively, remember to save your energy for the battles worth fighting.
There are times when we waste our energy on the ideas of battles, ones we are anticipating, that never actually arrive. We can find that we are defending ourselves over illusions of challenges to our thoughts, our feelings, our choices, our sense of selves. Maybe there are battles that are happening around us and we think it's coming for us next. Perhaps we have been challenged before and believe it's about to happen again. Sometimes, we are right and there will be times ahead that we will have to stand up again. However, we need not exhaust ourselves arguing with imaginary adversaries. Once again, it's good to save our energy for the battles worth fighting.
Then, there are times when the battles are not ours to fight whatsoever. This isn't our conflict. It could be that we are still growing, still learning, still becoming the person we need to be in order to stand with strength in the ways we want to. It might be that we have already been here, done this and no longer have anything to prove in this area and now this is someone else's opportunity to develop through this sort of situation. Either way, it's important to know when a challenge is ours to rise into and when we need to stay out the way or move on somewhere else.
But know this, should it be your time to stand and protect your choices, your loved ones, what you want and who you are - then you have everything within you to rise to the occasion. The life you have lived to this point has provided you with the knowledge, the resilience, the fortitude, the courage and the strength you need to meet this. You have had the practice, the experience and the training and you have been readied and you can do this.
When Stag or Buck come into our lives, their message is for us to Pick Our Battles wisely. We can ask ourselves:
Am I in a position of defence right now or am I protecting what I believe in?
How does the word defence and the word protect feel different for me? What feelings are ignited when I feel defensive? What feels are inspired when I feel protective?
Is this battle actually mine to fight? What would I gain from it?
Am I fighting a battle that belongs to someone else? Even thought it may be well intentioned, am I robbing them of valuable experience?
Am I arguing with imaginary figures?
Who am I fighting with? Is it really the person am I in conflict with, or is it subconsciously someone else? Am I really fighting with myself?
Have I been here, done this before? Is it necessary to do it again?
Is this the best use of my energy right now?
If I do have a time ahead where I need to stand for what I believe in - am I wisely reserving my resources and energy in preparation for it?
Are there smaller, silly battles you get let go of in order to reserve your energy for that which truly matters for you?
What am I fighting for? And what do I want to fight for? What choices can I make now that honours this and allows me to walk with integrity?
When you need a boost of courage, you can call on Stag or Buck to walk alongside you in what you are facing and ask him to support you in being clear in your choices, in being intuitively quick on your feet and remembering the strength in your heart.
Stag and Buck are ready to bless you as your journey forwards now.
